i admit, that was depressing...

if you would ask me, between going to work on Christmas and new year or spending both holidays alone, i'd say going to work is ten times more depressing. at least when i was alone, i can pretend that its just another night or i can simply cover my ears and go to sleep. while at work, i am constantly reminded that the world outside is celebrating because for pete's sake, IT"S NEW YEAR!

this year is probably the most depressing Christmas and new year i've ever experienced in my 22 years of existence.

you know what is worst that spending Christmas and new year away from your family? it's spending Christmas and new year being verbally abused by assholes who think that they are the most superior race on earth yet can't manage to find a stupid power cord when told to unplug their devices.

Christmas was a bit better but new year was beyond terrible. i honestly felt like crying listening to the people around me counting down to midnight while i was also waiting for the dials to hit 12:00 and log in. worst, there were calls waiting so instead of saying "happy new year!" all i can do was deliver my opening spiel.

not even the thought of a holiday pay could cheer me up. i had to silently tell myself that i should be happy i have a job in 2012 and it is much better than being with my family and unemployed. i had to tell myself all kinds of crappy reasons why i am still better off than some people to stop myself from pressing the log-out button and going home. i had to tell myself these stupid lines all throughout the shift. lame.

seriously, i admit i am kind of used to hearing crap from customers and i don't mind it on normal days but it sure is hard to ignore on the first day of the year when you are green with envy because others are busy having the time of their lives while you are there, listening to the rants of people who are thousands of miles from you. it is even made worst by the fact that you hardly get enough sleep from all those new year-related noise around you and you want nothing better but to curl up in bed and pretend Christmas and new year does not exist.

really, i say, this is the most depressing thing that ever happened to me--- next to people forgetting my 18th birthday. but hell if i let this ruin my year! just because some bitter-common sense-deprived jerks decided to abuse my eardrums doesn't mean that the rest of my year will go in exactly the same way. my year will not be dictated by a single incident, much more by insignificant people. 

despite this depressing new year experience, this year will be a blast!