Dyoks daw oh...

[from: 101 Fun jokes]

HUMOR in UNIFORM!

This is the actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the chief of naval operations, 10-10-95.

CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.

CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

CANADIANS: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.

AMERICANS: This is the Aircraft Carrier US LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

CANADIANS: This is a lighthouse. Your call.

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4 MOST DANGEROUS THINGS IN THE ARMY


1. A Private saying, "I learned this in Basic..."

2. A Sergeant saying, "Trust me, sir..."
3. A Second Lieutenant saying, "Based upon my experience..."

4. A Captain saying, "I was just thinking..."

[from the Nepal Army Website]

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MILITARY RULES OF COMBAT

If the enemy is in range, so are you.

Incoming fire has the right of way.

Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.

Professionals are predictable; it's the amateurs that are dangerous.

The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions: When you're ready for them and when you're not ready for them.

Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.

If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.

Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you.

Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.

A Nepal Tara just proves that you were smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.

A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.

If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.

When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.

Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.

If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid

[from the Nepal Army Website]

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[wala lang..pampalipas oras...]